Dining Out With Dementia

I received a number of emails concerning my post about traveling on an airline and it got me thinking about the difficulties that can be found in a simple trip to a restaurant with someone in the middle stages of dementia.

Here are some tips to make the trip easier...

First, pick a restaurant location that is family-friendly or one where you may know the management or staff.  You already know what the atmosphere is like:  preferably unrushed, and not uptight.

Next, call ahead and make a reservation.  You might find out what times are the slowest, crowdwise in the restaurant and plan your visit for that time.  It is okay to mention that you are bringing in your loved one who has dementia and request a quieter area, free of as many distractions as possible.

If time permits before you go, review the menu online if you are not as familiar with the offerings.  This will help you narrow the choices down for the person with dementia.  When you get to the restaurant, you might let the server know that you are with someone with dementia and will be taking your time.  Some Alzheimer's organizations offer little business cards that you can hand to a person alerting them to the special needs of your diner without any embarrassment.

As you look at the menu, it may be tempting to make the meal decision for them.  Don't! Instead, give the person with dementia 2 or 3 menu choices at most.  You may look for items that are easier to eat and have pick-up-with-your-fingers parts to them.  A difficult to manage item will probably frustrate both of you.  You may even try the buffet with your loved one as they may find a visually appealing item there.

One of the benefits of being in a restaurant is that items come in courses, making for a less overwhelming time in managing one food item at a time.  Be sure that the server clears the old plates before the new ones come out.

Ask a friend or family member to join you to help with the social aspects of the meal.  Laughter and conversation can greatly aide in the eating process and a great time.  Try to relax and enjoy as much as you can.

When you are back home, review your preparation.  What could you have done differently next time so you can keep enjoying some out trips?

Readers:  what other suggestions can you offer about the dining out dilemna?