Dementia: Stop Fighting, Start Accepting

A recent article in the New York Times struck me as a great reminder of how simple the care of persons with dementia can be if we stop trying to control things and instead, we just allow things "to be".

The article was called, "Giving Alzheimer's Patients Their Way, Even Chocolate".  Discussing some basic stress reducing techniques used by a skilled nursing facility in Arizona, the article focuses on how we as caregivers, whether at home or working in a facility, have the ability to let go of how we think things should be.  Instead of automatically deciding what should happen in a particular encounter with a person with dementia, we need to tune into the moods of the person and go with it.  As the author mentions, if someone wants an experience that gives them joy, we should give it.  They use the example of a client wanting to bathe at 2 am and they encouraged it. Sounds so simple but then why is that so hard to do?

I think that it is hard because as caregivers we feel we must keep up the routine and manage everything. But it is an important reminder that letting go a bit can have great rewards to the person with dementia. In fact, research has shown that giving the person with dementia more freedom can actually decrease negative behaviors.

And what can be bad about an approach where chocolate is given?

Comments

[Greg]

I have a friend whose husband recently passed away after 4 years of struggling through dementia.

She has written a book that helps people to deal with all the aspects of caretaking for someone afflicted by this difficult disease.

From spiritual to practical to personal difficulties, she gives a blow by blow delivery of the myriad circumstances that caretakers of dementia stricken patients must deal with...and how to delicately handle all the aspects of their loved one's problem. The book is called Into The Mist - Journey Into Dementia by Kathleen Beard. She has a current blog as well. You can read about it here. http://intothemistbook.com/book-preview

[Sue]

Hi Greg: thanks for the information on the new book. I had not heard of it as yet.

Thanks for writing.

Sue

[Cara Larose]

Maybe there are some people like me confused about the difference between dementia and Alzheimer's. Before I chanced upon this blog, I've read some articles about them. Both diseases can be badly happening to anyone. It's really hard to accept that one of our loved ones has this disease, but we should do it, and must show support and love to them. Thankfully, it would be easier to find a home for patients who have dementia. Just keep in mind that you check the background of the health attendant to ensure your loved one is safe.

[Blog Specialist]

While little can be done to improve dementia in those who suffer, family members who find emotional distress in the hardship of Alzheimer Disease can call for therapy to find better methods of coping.